I Don't Feel Guilty About Weaning, Not Even One Bit

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It’s been three days since I started weaning my 3-year-old son.

And it’s been one year and 21 days (but who’s counting?) since I wanted to wean him.But a year ago, he started preschool and I started working more hours at my store. I decided to wait to wean, so as to not make too many changes in his life. 

However, now....it’s weaning time.

So, how is it going? For me, GREAT. I’m excited that after nursing a child (I have four) since 2005, I won’t be nursing anymore. I loved my nursing years, but I’m more than done with those years and ready to move on from nursing.


The little one isn’t doing as great as I am. His favorite thing in the whole wide world isn’t available for him anymore.


“It’s not fair.”

“I’m still little. I’m still a baby. I love leche. Why aren’t you giving me what I love?”


These are the things he tells me. And I hear the words and have moment of, “maaaaaaaaaaybe” but that feeling of “stab me in the heart!” isn’t strong enough to actually start nursing him mid-weaning. I truly am quite done nursing. 


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A year ago, when I wanted to wean him, I still had more in me to continue nursing through the changes he was experiencing. I could do it. I didn’t WANT to do it, but I could do it. Fast forward a year and I no longer have it in me to continue. 


It’s the difference between being ready and not being ready to wean.

If you’re considering weaning, consider first the benefits of continuing and ask yourself if you can continue for another week, another month or another year. You’ll know.


And when the time to wean comes, I recommend these weaning tips by La Leche League.


  • Don’t ask, don’t offer.
  • Offer a substitute (what this is depends on age, ie formula, water, other milks).
  • Offer foods or other drinks first before a short breastfeeding session.
  • Consider night weaning first.
  • Offer extra hugs and snuggles.
  • Plan to be out more during the day to help distract your little one from breastfeeding.
  • Avoid mastitis by hand expressing or pumping to ease engorgement, but do not empty the breast while pumping.
  • Be patient. It could take a while.


When you're ready to wean, you're ready. Breastfeeding is mutual relationship that has to work for both of you. When it's time, remember to wean gently, slowly and lovingly.


With kindness,
Giselle Baumet

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    Comments on this post

    Reba says...

    I just (a week and a half ago) weaned my 33 month old. I’m 26 weeks pregnant and didn’t want to tandem nurse. She had been down to 2 seconds to a minute of nursing before bed for months. I’d felt done for months. For a week or so I told her that mommy milk was almost gone and she seemed ok with that. My husband put her to bed th first night, the next night she asked once, cried for a minute, and accepted snuggles instead.
    I was surprised it went so easily for us, which to me verifies she was ready.
    So what worked for us was waiting until she was ready and talking about it beforehand. And substituting snuggles!
    Now she talks about how mommy milk will be for the new baby, but for now is all gone.

    Posted on July 01, 2016

    Giselle says...

    Laura, looks like it was meant to be!

    Posted on June 30, 2016

    Giselle says...

    Jenn, I would try either first dayweaning or nightweaning since that will decrease your milk supply. Also, there’s a tea called No More Milk by Earth Mama that is supposed to help. And finally, try not to finish a full feeding while weaning, so that your brain doesn’t give a signal to your milk production to make more. Good luck! I know it can be hard.

    Posted on June 30, 2016

    Jenn says...

    Thanks for this! I am so ready, but the hardest part is taking away the one thing that makes her feel safe, secure, and comforted. Breaks my hear!!! Is there anything you recommend for slowing milk production to help the process? I’ve tried peppermint and it doesn’t help me at all. Thanks!

    Posted on June 30, 2016

    Lisa says...

    Thank you so much for writing this! When I’m ready to wean, this will be my motivation.

    Posted on June 29, 2016

    Laura says...

    With my 3rd, I was prepared to be done with the nursing stage and just explained a few days before his 3rd birthday that my milk stops working after 3 years…. It totally worked. 2 weeks later I got pregnant with number 4 ?

    Posted on June 28, 2016

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